During a recent Coffee & Company event at Cockfosters and New Southgate Synagogue, guest speakers Lisa Coffman and Carrie Grant led a heartfelt and thought-provoking discussion about the experiences of neurodivergent children and their families. The conversation was both moving and enlightening, shining a light on the urgent need for greater understanding, flexibility, and compassion within our communities and schools.
Carrie Grant spoke candidly about her journey as a parent, educating and supporting her uniquely different children. She shared the joy and challenges of navigating systems that are often not built to accommodate neurodiversity. Carrie highlighted how tailored support, something that should be readily available, is too often delayed or absent. Both she and Lisa stressed that these gaps are not due to lack of care or effort, but rather systemic issues: insufficient teacher training, funding shortages, and rigid educational structures that leave both educators and students struggling.
A key takeaway from the discussion was the idea that many challenges faced by neurodivergent children could be eased with simple environmental adaptations, small but meaningful changes that create more inclusive spaces. Rather than focusing solely on a child’s differences, the speakers urged that we look at how surroundings, expectations, and systems can better fit the individual.
The speakers also addressed the increasing rates of autism and ADHD diagnoses, noting how the COVID-19 pandemic contributed to a rise in traits and behaviours that can resemble neurodivergence. Disruptions to daily life, social isolation, and trauma have had lasting effects on children’s mental health and development, sometimes blurring the lines between environmental stress and neurological difference.
Importantly, Lisa and Carrie underscored that mental health issues often intensify during adolescence, when pressures mount and self-esteem can waver. Many young people, they noted, end up unable to attend school—not because they don’t want to learn, but because the environment simply doesn’t meet their needs.
One particularly uplifting example shared was from a Taylor Swift concert, where thoughtful accommodations were made for attendees with autism, demonstrating how creativity and empathy can transform an experience into something truly inclusive. It’s a powerful reminder that inclusion is possible when we intentionally design for it.
Beyond schools and public spaces, both speakers emphasised the power of community, how vital it is for families to find peer-to-peer support, to share stories, and to know they are not alone. For neurodivergent individuals and their caregivers, belonging and connection can make all the difference.
This message resonates deeply within the Jewish community, where belonging and identity are at the heart of who we are. It’s imperative that we bring the spirit of inclusion we see in broader society into our own communal life, creating spaces where every individual feels seen, supported, and valued.
CNSS is already taking meaningful steps in this direction, establishing a support group for parent carers that has been warmly embraced by members of the community. This initiative embodies the values of compassion and connection that define Jewish life, offering a model of inclusion that we can all be proud of.
As we continue to learn and grow together, CNSS reminds us that inclusion isn’t just about awareness, it’s about action, empathy, and ensuring that everyone has a place to belong.
